My boyfriend G. Ferrero is a strong Latin man. With the exception of my father, I've never known anyone with such an admirable work ethic. He is one of the kindest persons I know. Like me, he is a true entrepreneur. He loves the art of business and he believes in treating others fairly. Above all he is careful with his words. He knows words are like living things that can scar the soul of another.
He has a saying and it's true.
La lingua non ha ossa ma fa rompere il dosso.
In Italian, it means--the tongue has no bones but it can break bones.
As many of you know I've had endure severe abuse for years by a convicted child sex offender and trademark troll who became fixated on me. I've been stalked, sued and harassed to the breaking point and beyond.
A few days ago I was celebrating my youngest son's birthday. It's a very special day to us. We not only celebrate the anniversary of his birth, but we also celebrate his remission from cancer that blinded him. While I was busy cooking and preparing for our festivities, my stalker was busy filing more legal garbage against me in the Montana Supreme Court.
The nightmare with this berzerker--never--ends.
The day after my son’s birthday was a film premiere for my movie, The Forlorned. I couldn't even attend my own event because of security concerns and rumors that my stalker and “friends” would be there. (He hangs around other convicted felons.) I would never want any harm to come to my readers, loved ones and friends who were there to support me, but there is no safe haven when you are being hunted by a madman.
Many people have asked me if he has had a mental evaluation. I have no idea. I'm not qualified to diagnose him--but my personal opinion is that he suffers from delusional disorder and sociopathy. Like a typical sociopath, he does not respect the word no--not from the police, not from the courts (not even the highest court in the nation, The US Supreme Court) and certainly not from me or his other victims.
I will NEVER forget the fateful day when he approached me and my boss at a lunch meeting. He wanted help getting in contact with agents and publishers. I was traditionally published with one of the best agents in the business. I told him how to go about finding the help he needed. He thanked me profusely and then later tried to persuade me to join him for his birthday dinner. Of course, I refused, which didn't score me any points with this sociopath. From that point on he couldn't accept that I had turned him down. That I wouldn't allow him to be a part of my movie, or have contact with my literary agent, or most importantly be a part of my personal life in any way.
Sadly, I doubt things will ever change. This child predator knows no bounds. All the experts I have contacted agree he will obsess about me for the rest of his life. This is very difficult to accept. I'm still struggling with the fact that my life has been forever changed. That my online presence is marred by his hundreds of posts about me. How I'm a fraud, a prostitute, a criminal. I went from being an introverted author just offering friendly advice to a struggling wannabe author to being a victim of a massive smear campaign. I was stalked, sued and harassed for years--all for what? for saying the word no?
To compound problems, the local courts (which he claims I control), Montana Probation and Parole, The Governor of Montana, The Montana Attorney General's office, The FBI and Countless abuse hotlines, and many, many other organizations--haven't been able to help me. However, I'm grateful to those who have tried. Many wonderful people within these organizations have done their best to stop the nonsense, but all have failed. It's like my stalker knows the fine line to walk to avoid having his probation revoked and being returned to prison.
So why not file another restraining order? Restraining orders mean nothing to him. As soon as a restraining order (or no contact order) is issued against him, he immediately files an appeal to the higher courts--he craves contact with his victims in any form he can get. This person is dangerous and there is nothing I can do to legally stop him from his endless pursuit of ruining my life.
And PLEASE do not ask me why I don't sue him for defamation. He has nothing to sue for. He incorporates himself so that he can protect himself legally. His freedom of speech protects him to lie about his victims and ruin us publicity. All his legal fees are paid for by the sweat of our hard earned tax dollars. He is on welfare and claims disability for having arthritis (too bad his victims can't be covered for medical costs from the stress he has caused.) My fees are not paid for. I am not on welfare nor are my attorney and court fees paid. In total this monster has cost my company, The Forlorned, LLC hundreds of thousands of dollars in fees. All for what? Revenge.
For years he has had his fun defaming my good character as well as his other victims, including the child he molested. We have had to take his abuse in silence. He has posted hundreds of mentions of my name and other information like my address all over the Internet including on his WordPress site and Twitter.
He has caused unrepairable damage to my businesses, my books, my movies, my personal life and to his other victims. Yet, the madness never ends.
I once had a city offical smugly tell me to just not read his blogs if it upset me. He totally missed the point. No one wants their reputation destroyed. No one wants their address put online and no one wants crazy people coming to your door. Relationships with readers are very important to authors. My career and my life are constantly at stake.
Words are powerful. They are weapons used by people like my stalker to destroy and disfigure the human soul. I try to watch what I say to others. I know that my words can have a great impact good or bad. Most of all be careful how you talk to yourself. Do not let the words of others destroy who you are.